What if.

A friend had mentioned in her blog that one of her fantasies , living 24/7 in a bdsm community had all since been squashed by the reality of vanilla life. Hog wash!

I feel in these days of fluctuating prices a small tract of land could be found and purchased by a group of lifestyles and could be formed into a gated community. Rules would have to be set as per visitors but the rest would be protocol driven. There are other communities that support the nudist lifestyle Why not a group of ten of fifteen couples . Unlike the nudist we would have to exclude children but a house or lodging could be set up for those in the lifestyle with children so the couple could visit with out their children.

I can think of a brochure for it all ready , Page one would have a picture of naked slaves sweeping the streets at the crack of dawn then hurrying home to cook breakfast. Second page would have some slave bein whipped because the eggs were cold again. While a few others wait tied to the fence for their punishment.

I could go on and on but the rest is for you to do.

Desensitization

An old English professor of mine would put emphasis on the object of the preposition. He would say object of the prep and the class would say sition with great strength, He would have loved the word desensitization. He would be one of the few.


I received an email from the humiliation group on fetlife. How do you over come desensitization? Specifically desensitization to humiliation was the main topic. We tend in our lifestyle especially now a days, to concentrate on what we like rather then just taking the right amount we over indulge. We get our desert before we eat our Brussels sprouts. What peeks my interest here is that the Dominants that comment said things such as I wish you lived closer or that it was not being done right worse that what he needs is a great amount. I believe his question was how does he get the same enjoyment he once did and to me those answers would just drive his desensitization further. An old expression you can’t whip a dead horse comes to mind.

Again I see this god complex in some dominants and worse see how little they listen or understand what is being said to them. Perhaps his dominant over indulge him in humiliation perhaps too many joined in , perhaps they did not know how to do it right could be but the cure is to bring him back down to his base give him a rest from it. A friend of mine s sub has a very tuff buttock toward cp. Her Master wisely does not use only one weapon in his attempt to make her fly. He varies from whips to clamps and needles. He varies time place and circumstance. She always finishes most sessions wanting more yet had reach orgasm at least once.

So for me I would remove heavy humiliation from his sessions and replace it with some loving humiliation such as a whisper of him being my little whore as we walked on the street not loud enough for any one to hear but him and perhaps put a little more playfulness into the sessions to give him a little vacation from being the downtrodden. I do wish that Dominants would sit back now and then and take stock of their own humanity rather then think their shit does not smell. When a slave puts us on a pedestal it is one thing when we do it ourselves it is another. When we do it we are setting ourselves and our slaves up for a fall.

Of course my thoughts, my opinion.

Things I won’t do or ask for.

Yes I do love telling anyone who will listen much like the ancient mariner of things I have done and would ike to do to slaves. I have listed rules and regulation my love of protocols, punishment sessions to extend play sessions and also my hard limits.

There are some things I will never ask for.

Permanent marks distinguishing ownership Cloud has been written on many an ass but never branded or tattooed. I love looking at those that carry piercing but have never told or ask a slave to have them done nor have I allowed them to do so in my ownership of them.

I will not be here for ever so to do so is just too much to ask of anyone. I am more impressed by the offering of slavery by some one to me then a mark saying I own them. I do not mark my stereo nor car and would not should I own a dog or cat so what would possess me to ask for such a thing of some one offering me more then any symbol could show.

Piercing for me get in the way of some play I like so nice jewels but do they come in clip on?

Now, for some thing a little more sombre asking for a a death pact. Something I had heard of in books such as the story of O and perhaps a few other stories. If the Master dies the slave commits suicide, Whoa Now I feel I can speak on this because I was asked to make one with a slave a few years ago. I did not refuse at first instead I pointed out she had children she had others depending on her and could not enter into such a pack nor would I ask any one to do so. If anything I want them to go off and tell every one what a great Master I was and boy anyone not trained by Cloud missed out.

There is a reality to the lifestyle we are not born to it as some think those supposed naturals that gave commands minutes after coming out of the womb. I am not a god I am close at times but just do not want to make as many mistakes as they have. I do not wish to control the length of time on this plane of existence merely like to enjoy the time I have and they have on it. The serious side of a slave asking for a death pact is it might be a cry saying they do not really have control over them selves to be a slave and should get help from outside of the lifestyle. I can see the ideal and possibility of living 24/7 but not this type of control this type is well passed a healthy bdsm relationship. My thoughts , my opinion.

Simple rule

In discussion with a few of my friends we came to a conclusion that many share in the lifestyle. Simple politeness is gone from the lifestyle. The etiquette that was instilled in me as a child. Simple things like respect towards one another to keep the world civil, both in the respect of you elders and betters as well as those beneath you. If I was nasty to a waiter in a restaurant because they were a waiter I was reprimanded for it. It did not matter that I was the customer he was doing me a service and I had to be polite.

I expect from a slave politeness but I also give servility to them. They might like being called a dirty f…..k… Bitch some times and I do to help them attain where they want to be. 90% of my interaction with them is quiet and without the vulgarities of vanilla life. SO I have a very simple house rule politeness at all times..

A ponderance on caging

Caging came up in another blog I read and I had a laugh. It made me remember the old rule on leashes. It a slave has a leash on and it hangs free with neither the slave or the dominant holding it it used to mean that person was offering themselves to anyone in the room. Should some one take hold of the leash then they had control over the slave. Since there are no rules in a large book then for me if I caged a slave and left them with no sign stating ownership I feel it would be doing the same as if I let go of a leash. The only thing that would stop me from gong up to a caged slave and having some fun with her is I am a strong believer in protocols, which really are based on common etiquette. I would have no problem if I was told the slave was an offering to all or if I was asked to play.

Ny first public play occurred many years agao and did not have th erules that so many think exist in the lifestyle. Dominants would gather in one room and have a drink while in the other room the slaves stripped and knelt when they entered and waited. Waited not for their Doms but by any dominant in the room. There was no choice except not to show up. SoO it did not matter whether you were in a cage or on a leash whether you like one dominant over the other.
We were just happy to play. Now I see the influence of advertisers show desire as rightful needs we want out perfect ideal and that to me had taken so much fun out of the lifestyle. No spontaneity no fear of what might happen just following a script.

Safe , I don't think so!

Safe is not a word I would ever use in the description of the lifestyle or those in it. I find it is used too often and more as a carrot to entice then anything else. Many years ago when clubs were dark and dank hankie codes were the only way of communicating. In that time there were many combination of where the hankie was and it’s colour which stated what the person was and into. Now I have racked my brain and I do not remember any combination of the above that would tell you some one was safe.

Now I do realize that there is a great trend in the vanilla world to rubberize everything we have to where helmets to ride a bike, our children cannot play tag because it is aggressive and the list goes on and on. I think if you join a football team you know that there is a chance of injury. I do not remember any team stating they were safe. Hockey no, Lacross no anywhere or time there is physical contact of an aggressive nature there is a chance of injury. No one I know of would look me in the eyes and say I play contact sports because I know I am safe from injury.

So for me the word safe should not be used so liberally. The lifestyle is not safe it is an extreme sexual foreplay at the least. It can hurt your body you mentality and your self worth. It is not meant for the weak of mind and should not be water down in anyway to please the trend set in the vanilla world or make it easier for acceptance. Like an extreme sport you have to know the rules and risks going in. This one there are no rules set in stone. I do not believe that there is a save way versus an unsafe way to participate. You cannot rely on another’s experiences to keep you safe. You have to read, go to munches and play parties where you can watch and see. You have to realize that a spanking in a fantasy is one thing and not sitting down for a few days without jumping out of your skin might not be the experience you are looking for. So before asking for twenty tight ones with a cane try a few ass slaps first.

Last tid-bit of this semi rant. YOU whether Dom or slave, submissive or top are making the decision to play you and only you are responsible for your safety. If because some one says they are safe or if you do it this way it is safe does not mean your safety is ensured.

On the other hand

I was at a munch last night, something I had not attended for about a year. I was pleasantly surprised to meet Agdistis there with her new partner. Lovely chatting with a newbbie to the lifestyle to hear her ideas and concepts so nice to see the energy she puts forth being that this is the start of her journey. IT is funny how much the lifestyle had changed and how many degrees have formed. IT is also funny how discoveries are made when sitting talking with others. A new Domme found out how much more her sub would like to go in the service end and staying in role, which she seemed to be quite happy about.

I also sat for a bit with a friend that had split from his Dominant recently. Though he presented himself as being happy marching off to a play party with his toy bag he was not the same talkative lad that would at times tease his Dominant. More like Bob Cratchet after loosing tiny Tim than a man off to have his dark desires realized.

Last a small rant I am sadden to say that I find many of us older ones are letting slip the values that we had held to and defended so hard, because of lack of work ethics , fashion or we are getting tired . I am saddened by the lack of protocols and behaviour accepted.

On the other hand I am glad to see the enthusiasm is present in the new ones to life style and was encourage last night by a few bright hopes and look forward to hearing more about their journey.